Cooking and Baking

I love to cook. I loved my Nanny so much when I was little (and I still love her although now she's part of the energy of the world), she taught me how to cook and it's something that I enjoy immensely. Culinary journey for today: Making pear bread and I'll put my own tweak on it. A recipe is a guide, you know and there are so many possibilities. I got a recipe online and will be adding my own stuff to spice it up. Last night I made "shelley beans" or shell out beans. Being a vegetarian, I am always trying to come up with new stuff to add to the repertoire. I don't like making everything with soy-meat. I am a vegetarian, not a meat replacer. Now, sometimes, I will add "soyrizo" or another product, don't get me wrong- I love my no-sloppy joe's, but not every day, plus there is the danger of too much soy as a vegetarian which alters/ raises estrogen levels.
My mother had breast cancer, now in remission, so I have to be extra careful. My grandmother had cancer too, and died from it. That was one of the hardest things to go through as a human- so much pain for her, and so much pain and sorrow for our family. I clean my Papouli's house (grandfather in Greek), and he still has my grandmother's ashes on the mantle with a shrine. There are dried flowers for her memorial- He even has a burial site, but refuses to put her there until he is gone as well. I have a pact with him that I am to mix them together. I'll take some to the burial site and the rest to some secret places which he and I have agreed upon. One thing is, and I know this sounds strange, but as you know I don't care, I channel her when I cook. I remember days of cooking and baking with her after faking sick to get out of school. That woman had some style. Wish those reality cooking shows were on before, she'd have wiped them out! I can only hope that when this world and Isvara have a finished product with me, that I am half as good as my Nanny was. My Papouli gave me her wedding ring which she wore for over 50 years, I don't care about material bobbles and bangles- it;s just a simple band, and she also left me all her recipes. She had recipes from the 40's and 50's cut out of old magazines and off labels. I miss my Nanny terribly, so I'm going to put my hands in some ingredients and bake this bread!